An Explanation into Tesla Ownership…
Tech founders and Tesla seem as inseparable as… err, avocado toast and hipster brunch spots. This begs the question: why do these entrepreneurial visionaries and hopeful disruptors gravitate towards Elon Musk’s electric marvels? Most are probably not even self-confessed car lovers, in fact the term “petrolhead” couldn’t be further from the truth for many. Tech founders often see the car as nothing more than a tool and conveyance, which is loud, dirty and an annoyance to maintain. It wasn’t long ago that most electric vehicles were toys for children to play in, but now they are a statement of virtue for kale-eating grown-ups and intrinsically linked to those who love tech.
Clarkson’s Damning View
All this love for the Tesla is completely at odds with one of the biggest car journalists of our time. Jeremy Clarkson sums it up succinctly: “Which would you rather have, sex with Natalie Portman or a sewing machine?” In the final episode of The Grand Tour, Clarkson went on to anoint us with this emotional monologue: “I’m simply not interested in electric cars, they are just white goods. They are washing machines; they’re microwave ovens. You can’t review those; you can’t enjoy them. They are just SH*T.” This crushing indictment has done little to dampen demand for Tesla cars, let alone deter the tech community.
More Than Just a Car?
Tesla-loving founders may never have contemplated deriving such status or spending so much money on a car, as they have on their beloved Tesla. Chances are, nothing with an internal combustion engine could ever combine with software and flat screens so well as to create a product category in personal transportation. The good news of all this? Now those company-branded hoodies have a purpose; they make great rags to help keep Tesla paint clean and shiny on car wash day at the weekend.
The Tesla Revolution
The tech founder’s indifferent view of the autocar changed with the advent of the Tesla, which is worn as a badge of honour and signals pride in a founder’s tech status. The generic white good appliance, that is the Tesla, can also be fashionably paired with a black polo neck, half rimmed glasses and topped off with a flamboyant ponytail to complete the ‘look’ – if you could call it such. Although I’m sure every founder worth their last funding round would much prefer to match the Tesla to their own ill-fitting branded hoodie. We need to delve deeper into the psychology to understand why tech founders and Tesla have developed this symbiotic relationship.
The Cult of Elon
First, there is the association with Elon Musk and all he stands for, although this is somewhat tainted after a less than successful foray into politics. If Steve Jobs is the patron saint of innovation, Elon Musk was the rockstar prophet of futuristic cool. For many tech founders, driving a Tesla is akin to swearing allegiance to the cult of Elon. It’s not just a car, it’s a rolling tribute to the man who promises to colonise Mars, save humanity from artificial intelligence and maybe even find a way to make flamethrowers practical for daily use. Owning a Tesla is like owning a piece of Musk’s vision, a slice of that boundless ambition and sometimes borderline craziness. Somehow, bringing together bland car design with a middle-aged CEO results in urban chic on four wheels, at least when software and an oversized flat screen are included.
The Founder-Ego Turbo Boost
Tech founders are often characterised by their larger-than-life egos, and nothing strokes that ego quite like driving a car that screams, “I am the future.” Teslas are sleek, fast in a straight line and packed with technology that makes even the most mundane drive feel like a scene from a sci-fi movie. Autopilot? Check. Ludicrous Mode? Double check. A gigantic touchscreen, complete with fart noises, that makes you feel like Tony Stark with a sense of humour? Absolutely. It’s the ultimate toy for the tech-savvy adult who refuses to grow up and needs some respite from the stress of running a startup. At least that is, until the app to unlock the door stops working, preventing you from getting inside. While the image offered by the Tesla massages your ego, colleagues will undoubtedly make fun of your tax efficient vehicle choice.
The Ultimate Virtue Signal
In the modern startup, where managing your carbon footprint can be a signal to environmentally minded customers, driving an electric vehicle (EV) like a Tesla is the ultimate virtue signal. It’s the automotive equivalent of saying, “I care about the planet,” but with the added bonus of doing it in a way that still turns heads at every corner. Just don’t mention the precious metals that were mined using child labour to create the batteries, not to mention the resulting excessive vehicle weight, causing more tyre particulate pollution than any saloon-sized vehicle has a right to. Founders can roll up to their next investor pitch or customer meeting with the “quiet” confidence they’re not only saving the world (unlikely) but doing so in the most appropriately stylish way possible.
Mobile Networking
Startup life is all about networking, and what better way to network than by owning a car that doubles as a conversation starter? Picture this: you’re at a tech conference, and instead of awkwardly lingering around the hors d’oeuvres, you casually mention, “Oh, I drove my Tesla here.” Suddenly, you’re not just another face in the crowd; you’re a person of status and interest, almost on a par once with Saab-driving architects. People flock to you, wanting to hear about your experiences, the autopilot adventures and the inevitable tales of range anxiety. Your Tesla becomes a mobile networking hub, and you’re the focus of it all. This scenario only really plays out in the mind of the founder, failing to transfer into the real world where everyone else lives.
The Perks of Being a Technophile
Let’s not forget that tech founders are, by definition, technophiles, they only communicate with the outside world via Slack after all. They live and breathe technology and Teslas are essentially computers on wheels. Now they can finally interface with an appliance that for so long they couldn’t have cared less about. The software updates, the app integrations, the ability to summon your car from a parking spot, like you’re in a James Bond movie, all these features cater perfectly to the gadget-loving tech founder. It’s like owning the ultimate piece of wearable tech, except it’s not just wearable, it’s drivable. If only it came in the same colour as your company branded hoodie.
The Perfect Culture Fit
Image and culture are everything to a young startup. Driving a Tesla aligns perfectly with the image of a cutting-edge, forward-thinking innovator. It’s the vehicular equivalent of wearing a branded hoodie and jeans to a board meeting, casual yet somehow sophisticated, practical yet luxurious. It shows that you’re not bogged down by outdated norms and are instead embracing the future with open arms (and an open wallet). It symbolises the intersection between tech entrepreneur and social justice warrior, and just like many of those do-gooders the virtue is both misplaced and erroneous.
Saving on Fuel
Startups are often strapped for cash, and while Teslas are far from cheap, the savings on fuel can be significant if you charge at home. Every penny saved at the pump is another penny that can be spent on expensive artisan coffee, avocado toast or another company-branded hoodie. Plus, in the eco-conscious ecosystem of tech startups, the idea of driving past a gas station without a second thought is incredibly appealing. At least that is until your battery charge is low. Then you may begin to wish you had a ‘normal’ car that could refuel in less than five minutes, so you could be on your way to the next meeting in time, instead of calling ahead and apologising, again.
Cool is Everything
At the end of the day, one of the biggest reasons tech founders choose to drive a Tesla is simply because they’re perceived as cool, at least to non-petrolheads. There’s an undeniable allure to driving a car that looks like it rolled straight out of a science fiction movie, if that is the image you get from a part-worn bar of soap. Visually, it’s an uninspiring symbol of status that communicates success and forward-thinking. Founders find them appealing because they are congruent with all key components of a tech founder’s identity – a bit bland and uninspiring, but technically gifted and therefore somehow cool.
Saving Zero Planets
Tech founders drive Teslas for a multitude of reasons, ranging from the practical to the symbolic. Whether it’s the cult of aligning with Elon Musk’s vision, or the joy of driving a technologically advanced vehicle, the Tesla has become the car of choice for those who aim to innovate, disrupt, virtue signal, convince others, and themselves, of their coolness and perhaps even pretend to save the planet. The viability of EVs doing anything remotely friendly to the environment is rightfully contested. So, how can we define the joining together of electric cars and tech founders to make sense of this pairing? We can perhaps call it a form of identity outsourcing, to signal to the world how cool you think you are and just in case no one can see the branded hoodie while you’re driving.
You may want to read: “The Truth About EV Fire Risks.”
